Monday, February 14, 2005 // 12:09 AM

agitation. i am so completely tired of everything. agitation, leave me alone. this must be some sort of burden, some sort of issue unsolvable, have i left some thing to fester in your mind? i cant stand the thought of it, i cant stand how it feels on the road i have chosen, that is, in disregarding it, forcibly, ironically, can i succeed you, without laying my nerves to waste. logical mind says this might come between this and functionality, a dull swipe of practicality at the back of my mind. i am sorry for not being a rational person, but i am sweating bullets and later blood, i am setting myself up for a cooler facade, greater restraint and more painfully guarded conversation. hello please, please give me endorphin shots please give me some thing some thing to be excited about, remedy swift nervous energy and paralysis of concentration. i am going to sleep right now just to shake it off.

please please chemical happiness.