Thursday, March 10, 2005 // 7:17 PM

what made me think. tieh, how she said c had as much as a right to be happy in school as i did. because i never thought of that before, the whole idea of a right to happiness, my infringing on it, on you. things become more than a question of prerogative.

that was in sec one, i am thinking about you because of primary school contacts suddenly springing up, i find myself having to apologize for having done well. yes i got six oh you got sixteen. there is a full five minutes of amazement on your part, i am not berating it, i am just saying, what do i do now. i dont know how to take compliments, by the way, please dont give me any, no matter how much it is that you mean it. another conversation killer, anything that i can only return with speechlessness.

i am reminded of a million different situations i could have wound up in. who am i to say i would take anything back, because things have twisted their way here and i am pliable, without realising anything. full stops are not for me to draw.

i really want to talk to you and simultaneously not be bothered by the notion.