Friday, January 20, 2006 // 11:25 PM

all my cards are on the table

talked to shumay, haven't talked to her for a long time. understanding, it eludes me, sometimes, i really. don't know what to think, of myself. crazy oddball, or tired, i'm just. talking to people isn't the same for me anymore. sigh, i don't know, i blame this on a yearning, an ever yearning for someone else, someplace else, yearning, it is not the best thing for the state of contentment.

i want to be really freaking mellow sometime soon. i need to unwind before i snap. another round of LD camp tomorrow, i forsee some serious chaos coming up, but i'm determined to have fun, and my going to sleep right about now would probably facilitate my ability to function, tomorrow. the million things to do, i don't need a 16pf test to tell me that i don't take stress well. i'm really sorry, all the people who i've been horrible to of late.

mister perry called me immoral today. oh no. and the 16pf test we took in school a long time ago told me that, amongst other things, i need professional help, WHUT. Ms. LOh's profile patterns indicate that she may be experiencing enough personal concerns about herself to benefit from seeking helpful and supportive professional counselling. A trained professional counselor should help her develop the skills needed to cope with the concerns she seems to be feeling. In addition, because of her possible personal difficulties at this time, Ms. LOh should be very cautious in making decisions about her career options and interests based on information in this report. GEEZ what a form reply or what. hurhurhur. i always did wonder how one might say a thing like this ever so gently, now i know. what heck, this came out of nowhere because i really don't think i felt screwed up at the point of taking this test, and i really don't think i need to be cured of anything, any more. hoho. or maybe i've resigned myself to my neurosis, help, i'm a nutcase, it's official! this is scary, really, the idea that even after all that i've come to a point of less recognizabled messed-up-ness.

things that made my day

1) jobang making this damn joke about our loooong (nonexistant) queues for the filmfest tickets we were selling. and being so very obliging as to run around attempting to buy me baked potato and getting me chicken rice and etc etc etc. hurhur. jobang, i am silly around, reminds me of kevin, who has sucked up enough of my shit-and-needy-female-ness to have deserve my undying loyalty.

speaking of, 2)
my very own aqua citrus says:
okay, today i absolutely blew this om talk i was giving to the sec ones
my very own aqua citrus says:
for starters, i introduced myself like this
my very own aqua citrus says:
"hi, i'm kevin. you can call me kev, or you can call me, Tonight ^^"
my very own aqua citrus says:
which NONE OF THEM GOT

hohoho. i love kevin. how many people do you know would do something like that.