Sunday, March 19, 2006 // 7:56 PM
the untalkative bunny says:
hello, catastrophe waitress
dear catastrophe waitress says:
hello, untalkative bunny
the untalkative bunny says:
are you close?
dear catastrophe waitress says:
just about as close as nietzsche and a chimpanzee
the untalkative bunny says:
quite close, then
i need to listen to more songs with strange beats. with, say, 6/8 beats. i really really want to push myself for piano. it's one thing to have an individual style, it's another thing to only be able to play in a certain way. me of monotonous playing, booo. i want to learn how to play with tim's style, all the grandeur, all that male-ness. even if i probably won't use it often, i don't think that kind of playing really does very much for me. but i'd like to at least be capable of it, to some degree. it's my whole dysfunctional relationship with rhythm. after hearing him play today my fingers just didn't know what to do. if my fingers could babble incoherent, they would be. rhythm's one of those things that you've got to thoroughly thoroughly undersand, that needs to come from inside you, before it can even start to sound good.
and i didn't know how to tell him that my ears are wired in a way that results in my being unable to distinguish lower notes properly. ella will never be a bass player.
i realise. i need people or things to keep me sane. sebbie says i am highly strung, and was nice when i was whining today. i make a lot of studious type noises, don't i. studying will kill me, i promise, i really do. get stressed easily, don't i, go crazy easily, don't i.
i need a lot of. therapeutic things. or patient and long suffering and moderately indulgent friends.
things that i thought would make me happy two weeks ago and which i have gotten
- hanging out with someone just to talk
- a good comic book
- dance
- something gorgeously beautiful
- talking to someone who would make me laugh
- being nice, and niceness in return
- doing silly things like baking disaster brownies with fong,
which just leaves:
- a haagen daz fondue
- talking to someone who understands me?
- (bluntly)a good jam session with good musicians
- joyride to the sunset and good music
- time enough to finish my book
- love
- a golden retriever
- hanging out with someone who gave a shit?
so then it's probably been a good week.