i think i can be happy again. i am. not pissed off with myself, i think i am over that much. but i'm still kicking myself all over the place, for being so completely ridiculous but ridiculously happy.
and being so stupidly, ridiculously sad when i suspect that i could explain it all away in terms that are just far too familiar.
there's this gorgeous hymn with five flats for tomorrow that i can't play but want to badly enough to stay up for another hour to practice.
askew, you
_______________
(giddy dreaming and amends-making and deprecating and feel-good wanting)
(i have made myself ea$ier to plea$e)
-a powerful moutain bike :(
-a pint of bailey's irish
-james; calvin and hobbbes comics
-a true chocolate eclair
-peanuts comics, foxtrot comics
-pearls before swine comics
just give me some good-feeling
-take music seriously
-dance
-(sincere) hugs, often
-less impersonal people to talk to
-honest and self-honest people to talk to
-a regular dose of live music
-to wander around cities in a foreign land
-giggling silliness
-gorgeous landscapes
