Saturday, May 27, 2006 // 12:25 AM

the last 24 hours

we bladed (bled?) around school today and i thought of nanyang, and the good old days. of all the getting into trouble, of hysterical laughter, the kind that is just so gloriously lacking in self-consciousness. i miss doing stupid things, i can't help feeling so endlessly old, now. now that i can't remember the last time i did something recklessly fun, like that.

and we went up to the roof too, and i want to remember that moment forever, seeing it for the first time, looking out over the ledge at the school and the trees and houses sprawling beyond, vaulted blue sky arching over our heads. how far away and inconsequential everything else feels, how still and how silent it is, up there, how mellow. the still and unmoving centre of the universe.

it makes me think of kwanie, as an afterthought. and how he would take a hundred and one pictures and be as fascinated with things as i am. or at least be very patient with me while i curled up into the mellow-ness.

and looking at the sky makes me feel like nothing else, as cheesy picture postcard an idea as it is, me sitting on the ledge reading atwood as the rainclouds came and went with the sunset. i could stay forever, it makes me so thrilled-kid ridiculously happy. and there were stars splashed across the sky when we finally walked out of school, chinese high is eerie-gorgeous at night. things haven't felt this gorgeous for a long time and i would like to soak it all up, like a sponge.

production being good is quite a peripheral. gorgeousness has made this a very good day.