Thursday, October 05, 2006 // 10:23 PM

Not Maudlin

Pterence the Pterodactyl says:
alternatively
Pterence the Pterodactyl says:
you could fedex yourself to me :D

I'm so tired, I want to shrivel up on this kitchen floor and not move, til tomorrow. I blame youtube, and the whoselineisitanyway videos, and Marcus, for getting me started: much love to all three :D

Ma and Da just left for Australia, and I have no idea when Da will be back. Firstly, I don't know whether the house will still be standing in a week, because I doubt very much that me or Mike is going to do very much housework, any at all, beyond our personal spaces, and this house is just too big for all the work we are unwilling to do. And secondly, I don't know how I feel about this idea of not seeing my father, for I don't know how long and then some time after, even though I don't talk to him much he's been easier to get along with, lately, pottering around the house feeding the fish and bringing our laundry out. I can tell it makes him happier to be at home and semi-retired, and I hope he's happy in Australia, and I hope he doesn't completely lose himself in a world that we cannot relate to. (Not that we do much relating, with each other, other than the blood ties which we- or I at least - had no choice about.) So I am not maudlin, sentimental about his leaving permanently in phases which this particular trip marks the start of, I note with a rather unemotional eye that he has taken my green and black suitcase from the top of my cupboard, and has been ingenious with rafia and rubber tubing handles for the coolers that hold his insulin and computer equipment. But while I am not maudlin, I know Ma would be, about this whole idea, about the family literally being dispersed over different countries especially since I'm not really that old now am I. This is the sort of thing you see when the second generation has gone off to study in a foreign country and fallen in love with some specimen of native and thus has decided to plant themselvs in that new continent. I don't qualify and sure as heck Mike doesn't, maybe Michelle but even so only maybe. It feels strange to think that my family is going to be all over the place, I don't know, what does one come home to, then?

This has been an frivolously eventful bunch of days, and some day when I have recovered from the late nights spent on youtube, I will think about them, and try to pin them down. But this has been a happy enough week, a peaceful enough week, an unanxious enough week, and, and I really should study. I'm not quite noticing the time, the days, counting themselves down; Here's what I noticed today; The world looks like it might through the lens of an indie film camera, because of the haze; the air is a slow shroud blanketing us as we step outdoors, and things are dim and fuzzy around the lines if you stare hard at them for long periods of time. It looked like a gorgeous day from the bus window on the way home.